To My Best Friend in Infertility Who is Finally Pregnant

December 7, 2017

 

My sweet friend,  We have had so many talks, so many grip sessions, so many prayers, so many emotions through this journey.  Even though I sit here barren while you look absolutely glowing with pregnancy, I am so thrilled for you!  I know how long you have waited, and how much you have prayed for this sweet baby.  I also know you hurt for me and try not to show too much excitement, but I want you to!  I want you to enjoy every moment that comes with this baby you have waited so long for.  I can see the guilt in your eyes when you look my way, and for that reason I will not be at your baby shower.  I want you to enjoy that day without guilt, because I know how much you want me to experience this with you.  But, darling, you deserve happiness every second of this pregnancy, because I wanted it for you just as bad!  I know the struggles you have faced.  Others are happy for you, but we share a secret that they will never know.  Please don't hide your excitement from me, I want to rejoice with you.  As we look at our lives so similar, yet so different; I am blessed to have you on my side in this journey and call you my friend.  

 

It is inevitable in this journey to find common bonds and make life long friends.  We need each other to talk to and cry with.  It is also inevitable that those infertile friends you have made may get the one thing you most desire.  I have a dear friend who has been through it with me, and yes she is finally glowing with pregnancy.  I can see the hurt she carries for me.    Adoption was my calling, but adoption does not fix infertility.  The sting will always be there.  She still understands, she still gets it, and she will always be on my side in this mental emotional infertility battle.

 

 

 

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